Thursday, February 16, 2006

If Automobiles Were Designed By Microsoft.

They would come in 500 body styles and 2000 colors yet only start 50% of the time.

As well as a car, it would also be a boat, an airplane, a lawn mower, a washing machine, a refrigerator and a video camera. But none of these would ever work properly.

They would have 1000 page instruction manuals, written in incomprehensible jargon, which would devote 100 pages to the car seats, but none to tell you what to do if the car doesn’t start, nor how to adjust the timing, injection or change the spark plugs.

Sometimes when you turned the key to start, insulting or incomprehensible messages would bellow out from a speaker beneath the dashboard, such as, “What you are doing is illegal!” or “Error! The blexpics is unattached to the fundumentum, do you wish to continue, yes, no?) Often when driving along, you would get one of these messages and the engine would stall.

3 Comments:

Blogger WerniTheWebber said...

Actually computers have improved much faster than cars in the last twenty five years. I forget who said this but there is a line or two that goes
" if the automobile industry had improved as quickly as the computer industry a new car would have a one hundred thousand horsepower (125 Mw ), get three million miles per gallon ( 0.0002 litres/100 klics)and cost three dollars to buy." [note correct Canuck translation]. Microsoft types are assholes but even without them these would still be complicated machines. But there might be, at least, a little more predictability and less silly proprietary stuff. How many people use IE6 instead of Google (okay Google are assholes too, ask the Chinese). Or does anyone ever bother with WMA? I find winamp and Real Player are good for audio. And RP can be used for audio capture ( ie. LP to optical ) although I haven't tried it in this capacity.

2:59 PM  
Blogger Werner said...

This blog is really weird. i can't seem to just comments consistently. When I try to get a blog account ANY "user name" is rejected as being "unavailable". Occasionally a comment will be posted successfully but without any predictability to the process.

Werner

6:09 PM  
Blogger Werner said...

think I've got it to work now.

7:59 PM  

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